"It's a thrill to take all of a guy all the way down my throat,"
says one oral sex fan. "In fact, if I'm having problems deep-throating extra-large
equipment, it makes me feel inadequate."
Like so much else in life, being able to take a schlong all the way down to the
tonsils is a matter of both nature and nurture. Some guys have fussier gag reflexes
than others, true, and some are born with smaller mouths. But in any case there
are ways to improve technique.
It's pretty obvious that position matters. Things go smoothest when the curve of
the throat accommodates the curve of the cock. Probably the best, but oddest,
position is lying down on your back with your head hanging over the side of the bed.
It gets your throat in a nicely straight line, but also gets the blood rushing
to your head and makes everything look, well, upside down. A less acrobatic
possibility is to get your guy to lie back, straddle him facing his feet, and then
bend over and scarf up his meat. Come to think of it, the good old 69 is a pleasant
variation on this theme; no wonder it's so timelessly popular. Whatever your contortions,
keep in mind you want the thing to slide down your throat, not ram your tonsils.
And what about the dreaded gag reflex? I asked one of the best cocksuckers I know,
figuring he'd long ago mastered his reactions, and was surprised to hear his answer.
"Of course I sometimes start to gag," he said, "and when I do I just back off for
a bit. There's also the problem of running out of air. Thanks to coaching...,
I've learned how to breathe around the penis, if that makes any sense."
Breathing slowly and evenly can also help forestall gagging. In fact, a relaxed
approach works best. With practice, it's possible to keep those throat muscles relaxed.
"Desire helps,too," my friend added. "It's funny how the right mental attitude just
opens up my throat."
(Oh, a quick word from Mum here: though oral sex is a pretty inefficient way to
transmit HIV, deep-throating unsheathed cocks may add to the risk, as heavy-duty
cocksucking can injure the lining of the throat. And there are other STDs to consider,
including - rather surprisingly - gonorrhea.)
Since practice makes perfect, a little homework never hurts. Novice deep-throaters
can practice on dildos, and even slowly sliding a couple of fingers way back there
can train the aspiring suckmeister to accommodate oral visitors without gagging.
Then, bring on those boys! But hey, if you do gag while chugging down the old flesh
sausage, not to worry. We're only human, right? Next time, you might want to find
someone with a smaller tool. Or you might want to give up deep-throating. Or you might
want to get down to practicing, one way or another, till you can proudly wear one of
those T-shirts that read, "Let go of my ears - I know what I'm doing."
Simon Sheppard
Now here's your chance to meet the man behind this column. OutUK has an interview with Simon Sheppard or you can take a look at some of his books that are currently available:
Looking for something very sexy and just as smart? Man on Man collects the best and hottest gay sex writing by Simon, who is also
co-editor of Rough Stuff: Tales of Gay Men, Sex, and
Power as well as a collection of gay erotica called
Hotter Than Hell.
In KINKORAMA : Dispatches from the Front Lines of Perversion he takes readers behind the unmarked doors and black vinyl curtains that lead to the sometimes shocking, often hilarious, relentlessly arousing scenarios of extreme sex. There
are also stories of bears in Tales from the Bear Cult: Beat Bear Stories from the Best Magazines.
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