POST MARDI GRAS CLUBBING

Europe’s biggest and cheesiest gay club will be bulging at its spangly seams Mardi Gras night. The pop dolls Hear’say headline. Guaranteed to get the queens screaming. No doubt a good time will be had by all.
10pm-4am The Astoria, 165 Charing Cross Rd, WC2
£12 Tube: Tottenham Court Rd

You’ll need to neck the guarana kids. Trade is putting on a 17 hour Mardi Gras marathon. Bow down sisters, you’ve got the Godfather of House Frankie Knuckles headlining this double bill of debauchery. The second wind features the Trade residents, taking it in shifts to stir you into frenzy. It’ll be rammed to the rafters. Book now to avoid disappointment, as they say.
10pm-4am/4am-4pm Turnmills, 63b Clerkenwell Rd, EC1
£28.75 Unreserved/£19.00 4am onwards Tube: Farringdon

If shamelessness is your scene get your twisted arse across the river. Fist aficionados know the score: leather/rubber/uniform/skin. Usual suspects behind the dex including Graham D, EJ Doubell and Karim. Down ‘n’ dirty. And don’t you just love it.
10.30pm-6am Imperial Gardens, 299 Camberwell New Road, SE5
£13/£15 Tube: Oval

Europe’s most famous gay club presents the Dark Desire Party. Resident jocks will be churning out the good time grooves ‘til your ankles give way. Includes a Mardi Gras extravaganza of a show, apparently.
11pm-5am Under the Arches, Villiers Street, WC2
£15 Tube: Charing Cross/Embankment

It’ll be busy, and there’ll be lads that’ll break your heart. Commercial uplift provided by Jo Public, Rich B and Sean Sirrs. A cheery crowd good for a cruise.
10pm-6am The Fridge, Town Hall Parade, Brixton Hill SW2
£11/£13 Tube: Brixton

Situated slap-bang in the middle of the west-end, Habit@onefourfour offers you four rooms to frolic in; belting out the best in underground house, tribal grooves and tech funk. DJs include Alan Thompson, Tony Sapiano and Paul Christian.
10pm-6am onefourfour, 144 Charing Cross Rd, WC2
£10/£12 Tube: Tottenham Court Road

Giant has moved to a bigger venue this time around: the SE1 club. With a capacity of 4000, Giant features five sound arenas each offering (and get this) “a cutting edge club experience”. The full line-up includes Crash, Wild Fruit, Salvation, Atelier, Barcode, SubStation and Coco Latte. For those for whom size matters. So see you there.
10pm-8am SE1 Club, Weston Street, London Bridge, SE1
£18 Tube: London Bridge

For those who just don’t know when to give up on a good time, DTPM presents a Mardi Gras special showcasing the DTPM All-Stars: Alan Thompson, Malcolm Duffy, Steve Thomas, Ariel et al. Those who haven’t remembered to rest shouldn’t look in the mirror. It’ll be Madge on her deathbed.
10pm-late Fabric, 77a Charterhouse St, EC1
£8/£13 Tube: Farringdon